Epic Laptop

4 06 2012

I find this laptop commercial ridiculous on so many fronts:

From the “soaring strings” dramatic music that seems more fitting for a movie montage to the descriptions that seem like they were written by a copy writer who recently discovered the thesaurus, the magnitude of this over-hyped laptop commercial makes me wish that the water droplets we see are actually going destroy the laptop. ¬†Just for the effect ūüôā

“When was the last time you heard something [this] incredib[ly over-hyped?]”


Lowe’s vs. Home Depot

23 05 2012

While I do like the new Lowe’s campaign for the most part, I have noticed something odd about their portrayal of home improvement.

Apparently it’s easy.

Just a flick of the wall painting pen here, roll out your carpet of garden there, and you’re done in an instant!
That seems realistic.  Like cardinals fixing up their own bird houses realistic.

Conversely, Home Depot has stuck with their standard, “We help you accomplish great things” philosophy. ¬†Maybe it’s my cynical nature, but I much prefer the straight shooter “get your hands dirty and you might accomplish something” method to the “Just dance through life to hipster approved music and magical things happen” approach. ¬†I think the fact that Home Depot doesn’t even post their commercials on their YouTube channel shows that their marketing focus is how to help customers get things done rather than creating buzz.Lowe’s seems to be focusing too much on creating viral sensation and it makes them seem less knowledgeable. ¬†They are comparable to Home Depot in most ways, and they even have some advantage with their MyLowes online to keep track of your house project*. ¬†But the most memorable part of their campaign is music and people dancing. This generally isn’t your go-to knowledge group for home improvement. ¬†Ron Swanson doesn’t take Lowe’s seriously either.

*My paranoia makes me think that is a brilliant market research scam posing as a helpful tool meant to get free information from homeowners about brand usage and preference. I haven’t researched it enough to confirm though.

Some Causes Are More Valid Than Others

22 03 2012

I’m going to go out on a limb and say that trying Miracle Whip isn’t as valid a cause as helping disaster victims, the sad animal commercial and well… almost anything else.

What exactly does this cause achieve?

From what I can tell, this cause is a facebook page where instead of a dialog, there is simply a forum for one-sided positive responses to “Miracle Whip is Gross!” ¬†(Which basically sums up how most political discussions work in America if you take out the part about your sandwich condiments choices and replace it with government officials)

This new “Keep An Open Mouth” Campaign hopefully won’t last. ¬†Usually when you compare your product to witchcraft and prostitution it doesn’t make people want to try it as this article points out.

Though maybe we should have seen this advertising down turn coming as we did get fair warning that Miracle Whip would not “Tone It Down” in the last campaign: their attempt to make Miracle Whip the choice of hipsters.


I personally agree with Pioneer Woman that Miracle Whip is indeed, from the devil.

Worst Tagline Ever.

7 05 2010

Where?  Where were the focus groups?  Where was the slightest faction of logical oversight?  Why Charmin?  WHY?

When I saw this at the end of the normally creepy bears in the woods commercial last night, I freaked out.  Just a little bit, because Charmin has crossed a new line of inappropriate animal defecation by leaps and bounds in what was already an ad campaign that has long worn out its welcome.

But then today, I went to their website to do some blog research and behold I was greeted by this monstrosity.

The “Sit or Squat” site.*

Charmin, have you no decency?

*PS, now the creepiest thing ever: ¬†The sit or squat site has a community section who’s purpose is only for people who want to talk with strangers about toilets:

Visit the Community
The community at SitOrSquat is designed to give people a place to interact with anything that has to do with bathrooms. Check out the selection including News, Blogs, Forums and Humor.

New Slate Article

3 05 2010

Not your best work, Seth.

I for one, like the Twix ad, because there is no benefit to eating a candy bar, except maybe not being able to talk during awkward moments while you “chew it over.” Who hasn’t used the “I’m taking a drink, so I can’t introduce you to my friend so you’ll have to introduce yourself which is my whole plan because I forgot your name” technique from Gilmore Girls?

As for liking Miller Light Commercials? ¬†I’ve always appreciated their campaign slogans like “It’s Miller Time” and “Miller, Always a Good Call.” ¬†Unfortunately, I have always had too much respect for myself to drink crappy beer, so a faster drinking bottle doesn’t really appeal to me.

(Seth, your overgrown frat boy is showing.)

Grilled Cheese. For People Who Don't Know What a Grilled Cheese Is.

19 04 2010

Raise your hand if you have ever eaten a grilled cheese sandwich.  Raise your hand if you ate one with tomato soup every Friday at Grove City College, freshman year through junior year thanks to Lenten Fish Fridays.  Just me?  Moving on.

As a huge grilled cheese fan, I have to say that Carl’s Jr.** is ridiculously off in their Grilled Cheese Bacon Burger Commercials. ¬†Let’s review.

First off, that guy actually seems to enjoy ordering off the kids’ menu. ¬†I would have to say he’s thinking, “Hey, I love me some grilled cheese, this is delicious. ¬†Nice, she brought my favorite crayon colors! ¬†Yeah, you know you ladies think I’m sweet. ¬†Also, these ‚Čą400 Calories in this sandwich is much more reasonable than what my friends are eating*. ¬†What?”

Secondly, a burger is different than a grilled cheese sandwich. ¬† If I’m in the mood for a grilled cheese sandwich, I am not looking for someone to put a burger, bacon, and¬†mayonnaise¬†on my grilled cheese sandwich. ¬†That is called coronary disease, and I think I’ll pass today.

Grilled Cheese = Victory

Eat grilled cheese or the Allies lose!

*That would be 820 calories in a Single Grilled Cheese Bacon Burger, Double Grilled Cheese Bacon Burger has 1020.

**Also known as Hardee’s.

Friskies ad

29 03 2010

New article from the Ad Report Card today on the new Friskies cat food commercial with very funny observations on what is the Alice in Wonderland Experience that apparently occurs when you feed your cat Friskies, which may or may not be laced with something a little stronger than catnip.

My only add on to this review is when I saw this commercial I was so lost as to why this cat does not try and eat one of the dancing turkeys, or at the very least the baby chicks near the end.

On an unrelated note, come on Friskies, you totally ripped off Morris the Cat from Nine Lives.¬† Except Morris was much cooler, because he said “no” to drugs.